Brave Barby too ill to attend

On Monday she told the Observer she did not feel up to the journey and had organised trustee Alan Rowland to pick up the award instead.

She was disappointed but hoped to organise a formal presentation at home in the sanctuary on Freezeland Lane.

The 73 year old was one of 12 people around Britain chosen for an award '“ Barby's is for lifetime dedication to the hundreds of birds and animals which share her home at any one time. Barby said: "It has all gone wrong '“ but my health has got to come first. There's no point being given an award if I'm not around to have it."

Barby had the ordeal of her operation back in August but she is still recovering from surgery and the effects of a drug regime which didn't suit her.

She said: "It went a bit wrong because of the tablets I was given for the pain '“ they sent me a bit doolally. For the first two weeks I was doing really well but towards the end of the second week I was pretty poorly, and then I had to change tablets. Then I threw a wobbly and binned them all but I couldn't stand up. Every time I stood up I fell over."

Barby experienced problems with headaches, stomach pains and dizziness until she decided she had had enough.

"I threw the lot. I said '“ that's it, I don't want anymore tablets. Now I am crawling back...all I am taking is paracetemol and tamoxifen to stop the cancer spreading."

She will begin radiotherapy in three weeks but meanwhile feels finally she is getting stronger, although it is still a struggle.

"I can't even think about doing for four or five months, they say, but I will be back to good health in a year. The scar tissue is not healing as quickly as it should do. The radiotherapy is going to make me feel horrible again, but I just have to lump it. It makes me feel a dollop '“ but what's new?

"I just feel useless '“ just sitting about.

"But I am sort of doing as I am told '“ I can't do anything else. I am getting there slowly but surely '“ shouting at everybody, but that's nothing new."