Be thankful or else!

Watching Prime Minister’s Questions last week I realised I have not clearly expressed my thanks to Theresa May and our Conservative government for the work they have done in securing a stable and prosperous future for this United Kingdom.

Fortunately, after every answer, the PM reminded us how good things are and how we can expect more of the same for the next five years.

I realised she did not need or expect any thanks from me. Just as well, really.

Thank you Mrs May for holding wages down across the board but particularly in the public service sector. Working people do not need that kind of inflation. Thank you for allowing us to do more than one job just to pay our way. Support for zero-hours contracts enable our workforce to be flexible as a gymnast provided they don’t want paying.

Thank you for increasing the money available to schools. You have targeted it properly so that we have more stunts like free schools and grammar schools and outside agencies teaching IT, not more money per pupil.

The schools themselves would only spend it on teachers and reduce class sizes. What do they know anyway?

Your education team knows better: not one of them has been tainted by spending any of their time in a state classroom. Public School was good enough for them to understand the real nature of education.

Thank you for your support of private owners in the housing market. For far too long council housing has been a drain on the profit that could be made by rental businesses gouging those less fortunate with rents higher even than mortgages.

We should build a fast railway and nuclear power stations not more homes.

If children stay with their parents up to their mid-30s, they can live much more cheaply anyway.

Thank you for your continued support of the NHS. Only a churl would suggest continued strife with junior doctors, reducing training of doctors, nurses and midwives, inadequate funding across the board and a desperate shortage of social care beds is anything to worry about. Increased privatisation will put a reasonable price on good health and we can afford it with the wonderful strength of the economy.

I could go on: your positive intervention for Southern Rail , bombing Syria, repealing that pesky Human Rights Act, renewing a nuclear deterrent we’ll never use, the destruction of nonsensical green initiatives, the increasing national debt funding reduced taxes for the wealthy. I could go on: there is so much for which to be thankful.

I feel safe in your hands: go out there, be tough, belligerent and secure no deal for Brexit. Raise taxes through increased VAT. Remove the triple lock on pensions. I look forward to playing my part in giving you a free hand in undoing all that so many of the people hold so cheap they give up and fail to vote.

I agree with you: it would be a tragedy it that there Labour Party should be elected to reverse the trends of 40 years. Higher progressive taxes to pay for stuff would be disastrous for the rich and if they don’t get cake how are we supposed to get the crumbs?

John Martin

Kithurst Crescent


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