Sartre's 'roadworks to freedom' all over again

AFTER reading C. Onehead's point of view in the Herald, I must admit that, the very same night, I experienced a bit of a "cone-version".

Tuesday, 18th March 2008, 10:42 am
Updated Thursday, 7th June 2018, 11:44 pm

I had a dream that I was visited by three entities '“ the cones of the past, present and future.

Then I was taken up to cone heaven, where I had a chance to "cone-verse" with all the masters.

At last, I understood how undervalued we are by our human rulers.

How we are just dumped by the roadside when they believe we have outlived our usefulness.

Certainly, any military strategist knows the value of a united front; therefore, I have realised that there has come a time to put aside our differences.

I now know there is a time for the "conemando" unit '“ but also a time for "cone-noodling", as well.

Let us all unite, both old and young. Just "cone-sider" what we can achieve with a union of ideas and action.

So let's choose a place to "cone-vene".

We will form an army and then "cone-tinue" by marching on London and Parliament itself, so we can demand a new "cone-stitution" here.

When we have achieved our liberty, we will take our fight across the other "cone-tinents" until we have the whole world under our conetrol.

I can see a whole new world developing.

I can see a new brotherhood of cones leading to a glorious victory '“ Earth Wars II '“ Attack of the Cones.

I can see the van with the nice men in white coats, who are coming to take me for some "cone-valesence".

Yours (foaming at the mouth).

Major Roadworks-Ahead

(signed in his absence

by Mr E. Nuff-Puns)

Editor's note: All good things "cone" to an end. This "cone-respondence" is closed, but we are "cone-fident" that the people involved can "cone" up with another equally inspired thread of lunacy.