SO NEAR and yet so far just about describes such a frustrating Saturday. To be so close to our first victory, and then to throw it away in injury-time, hurts. It really hurts.
Although it might seem strange to say, sometimes I would rather get comprehensively beaten than to lose in the dying minutes to a side we could, and should, have beaten.
Especially as their pre-match hype, as always, offered plenty of motivation. To read, and hear, so many harsh comments and arrogance from your opponents is always a great incentive to perform. But it also makes defeat even harder to take.
As I said before, we are getting better and so Saturday's performance, in parts, proved.
A fantastic first-half effort of blood and guts, but more importantly some good rugby, showed we had earned our narrow lead and the respect of Henley at half-time.
However, we were unable to maintain our momentum and, as the game progressed, we couldn't close it out — which has, for so long, been a trait of Worthing RFC.
Many things conspired against us on the day. Perhaps we used our "get out of jail free" card too often last season.
But going down to 14 men for a yellow card, which was given to the wrong player on the wrong team, and what can only be described as some very poor decisions by ourselves, and by the referee and his assistants, didn't help us.
Despite these things, we can blame or look no further than ourselves for missing a golden opportunity to gain four points in what is an incredibly competitive and unforgiving league.
To add to our frustration, it had been a productive week at training, where we had worked hard and changed several things in our game plan.
However, game plans only work if everybody buys into and believes in them and, at the moment, we are not all pulling in the same direction.
But we will, we have to. It takes time, but time is something we don't have a lot of.
Saturday's away trip to Chinnor is now a massive game. They were promoted like us last season, but from South West One. They are two places above us in the league and a win could lift us out of the relegation zone.
It seems strange to be talking of relegation in September after only four games, but it is a reality if our results do not improve.
We can take some solace from the fact we have played teams second, third and fifth in the league, and acquitted ourselves well, but that is no excuse.
The next month is critical and I believe it will almost decide our season. We can no longer make excuses about being the new boys in the league, and that we are learning how to adapt to National League rugby.
That time has passed. We must now begin to answer our critics.
In sport, respect is earned. We must now stand up, be counted and begin to earn it.
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