DOZY’S RAMBLES: More mindless vandalism of glass panels on Adur Ferry Bridge

Mike Mendoza
Mike Mendoza

I wonder how many readers like me have purchased a nice new barbecue only to find that what appears an easy self-assembly project is an absolute nightmare.

Over the years I have bought many self-assembly products with instruction sheets written by people who obviously have a minimal grasp of the English language.

Mike Mendoza with the damaged Adur Ferry Bridge S19805H143

Mike Mendoza with the damaged Adur Ferry Bridge S19805H143

Or you get instructions that are only a sheet of paper with a poor hand-drawn diagram showing you ‘roughly’ where the parts go and not a word written!

I must say that I was very pleased with how my purchase, a four-burner model, looked good in the store and was a decent price.

Not thinking I could fit it in my car, a very charming young man from B&Q at Lyons Farm tried to get it into the boot but failed and then managed to get it onto the back seat (after pushing the front seats as far forward as they would go).

The trick of course was to get into the car after – if you have a stomach like mine you will know what I mean!

Getting it out of the car and into my garden was an equally interesting challenge.

With the help of my wife we managed to man-handle the box into the garden.

What was amazing was, when I opened the box and took out all the parts, I found that the box was at least ten times bigger than the actual item.

With all the parts now spread out across my garden I started to read the instructions and then began the task in question.

Armed with a screwdriver and spanner I found that there we a couple of parts I did not quite understand so I went along to another B&Q store (Shoreham).

Luckily they had the barbecue on display, assembled, so I was able to inspect and get an idea where the parts went.

Surprise, surprise, as I was looking at it I noticed quite glaringly a couple of mistakes they made in its construction!

Whoever put it together obviously had the same problems as me.

So it was back home to study the instructions again.

As the ‘monster’ was taking shape I was getting very excited and, after 36 hours, I completed the task – I say completed, well almost done, I am now onto page 12, the very final fix.

The excitement is now growing. My wife and a friend are watching me with baited breath.

Okay, it really is now the very final fix. All I have to do is to attach the power pack that sparks the burners to ignite the gas.

Shock horror, this is when I discover that I had put the whole thing together back to front!

Which incidentally is one of the two mistakes Shoreham B&Q made.

My wife kept asking how am I getting on, is it ready yet, and so on.

There was no way I was going to take it all apart again so I managed to stick the box into position, as opposed to screwing it into place and, phew, a problem solved.

For what it’s worth, it’s a great barbie, and it works just fine.

So some mindless vandal has yet again struck Shoreham’s Ferry Bridge, with 30 odd panels being scratched.

What does some moron get out of damaging a much heralded community asset?

Hopefully this time the CCTV cameras will have on record the incident in question and hopefully the images of the culprit will be well publicised for all to see.

Or was the camera not working?

It must be summer and school holiday time.

How do I know? Look at the sky and it will give you a clue!

How sad with so many organising outdoor events only to have them washed out.

Hopefully the weather will improve but fear not as there are a number of well-organised indoor activities on offer.

Some very old photo’s that appeared on the ‘New Shoreham By Sea’ Facebook page fascinated me.

There is also a ‘walk through’ of the High Street from the east end to the Norfolk Bridge.

How things have changed over the past 110 years.

I understand the video is available on YouTube.

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