DOZY’S RAMBLES: Are you being good boys and girls?

Mike Mendoza
Mike Mendoza

Well after a break of two weeks from my column while I performed in the Alternative Pantomime in Brighton I am back and running, but I do have a feeling that I may still be in a panto!

My thoughts go to Buttons saying to the audience “Hello Boys and Girls” and maybe this is the way Adur & Worthing Council officers thought of the residents when they recently sent out their ‘Recycling Together’ newsletter.

I can only suggest that a child on work experience or a primary school teacher put the newsletter together.

While very eye-catching with the graphics, some of the wording is childish to the extreme.

For example: IF we are good recycling people we will get a gold star on our bin!

IF you receive a ‘Gold Star’ and a ‘Voucher’ it means you are very good boys and girls and can redeem your voucher, which is worth £10.

So where can you redeem your voucher? Maybe at one of the many eateries in our area? Or against food in one of the supermarkets?

No, boys and girls, you can take your voucher to one of the leisure centres in our area in order to keep fit!

Or in fairness it can also be used against an event at the Ropetackle, although which event or events is not identified.

So who decides we have the correct ‘rubbish’ in our bins so you can receive a gold star and go to the ball?

Enter the Recycling Police. These are people who will be coming around to your place to check your bin to see if you are being good boys and girls.

They want to see if your recycling contains A-grade materials.

These are the people who will stick a star on your bin if you do well and if you do not pass this time they will be back again to see if there is an improvement in the grade of materials you are recycling.

What is useful in this leaflet is the list of goodies you should and should not put in your recycling bin.

I still cannot understand why you can put paper in but not shredded paper?

The other list I find fascinating is how much the council gains out of your recycled rubbish – for example one wine bottle per month saves over £26,000.

I am delighted to report that the Mendoza household alone saves the council over half a million pounds with recycled wine bottles.

Back to the children’s aspect of the leaflet, there is now a competition for all our youngsters to come up with names for the trucks that collect and empty the recycling bins – Smelly Diesel is not a winning entry!

The winner gets to meet the truck and crew, and not even a silver star on offer.

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Does anyone really know what is happening at Monks Farm, the Brighton and Hove Albion Training Ground and the never used golf course?

I know the council welcomed Brighton and Hove Albion Football Club with open arms when they first muted the idea that they wanted to build their new training facilities in Lancing.

I was vice chairman of the planning committee at the time of the application coming before us.

The chairman was away and it fell to me to chair the application, which, in fact, I could not do as I was a season ticket holder and felt that I could be accused of a conflict of interest.

Therefore the chairmanship of the committee fell to another councillor.

As we know the application went through and a state-of-the-art facility was built.

The journey on the way was never going to be easy for the football club, as everyone knew, including the club that they were to build on a floodplain.

And that was after leaping all the hurdles of local objections.

The club had to install some pretty large underground tanks to take the water away from the ground and then store it for future use.

So the big question is, is a 500-seat stand a step too far for local residents?

The Albion’s reputation is growing by the week with a strong possibility of them going up into the Premier League.

The facilities at Lancing are second to none.

Will a stand help? Maybe, why not give them a chance.

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I am running out of room, but want to discuss the proposals for the Beach Green toilets on Shoreham Beach.

I will say a lot more next week, but for now, the expression give an inch and they take a foot comes to mind, only here it’s give a toilet block and they take the whole green!

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